We live in a culture that worships speed: fast results, fast responses, fast food. But growth isn't microwavable. It takes time, and sometimes the most productive thing you can do is stop.
That's the heart of John Maxwell's Law of Reflection: Learning to pause allows growth to catch up with you.
The Day Everything Stopped
In 7 Life Lessons from the Trailer Park, I shared the story of July 31, 2004?a day that began with excitement and ended in heartbreak. My wife, Kat, and I drove to Philadelphia to see Cirque du Soleil's Alegría. We had VIP seats, and the show was every bit as magical as we hoped.
Then my phone rang. A Florida number. I ignored it. It rang again during intermission. This time, I answered. My brother's voice carried the words I'll never forget: "Mom died."
In a moment, the lights of the circus faded. My world stopped. The drive home was silent, my mind racing with all the things I should have said but never did. All the times I told myself, "I'll do it tomorrow." Now tomorrow was gone.
That night, reflection wasn't optional. It was unavoidable.
Why Reflection Matters
Reflection is the transformative pause between experience and growth. It's the key to unlocking profound wisdom from life's moments. Without it, life blurs by and lessons slip through your fingers. You might gain experiences, but you won't gain the deep wisdom that reflection can provide. Reflection is your path to understanding, growth, and a more fulfilling life.
Maxwell says it best: "Experience isn't the best teacher?evaluated experience is."
Reflection forces us to:
- Ask hard questions. (What just happened? Why? What should I do differently?)
- Turn pain into perspective. (What can I learn from this loss, setback, or failure?)
- Recommit to what matters most. (Am I living in line with my values, or drifting?)
The Law of Diminishing Intent
In that same season, Maxwell's Law of Diminishing Intent hit me squarely between the eyes: The longer you wait to do something you should do now, the greater the odds you'll never actually do it.
I had spent years putting off words of gratitude and love for my mother, assuming I had more time. Reflection taught me the cost of "someday." It pushed me to stop delaying conversations, stop postponing appreciation, and stop living as though tomorrow was guaranteed.
Your Reflection Habit
Reflection doesn't have to wait for a crisis to occur. You can make it a rhythm. Here's a simple starting point:
- Daily: Before bed, ask yourself: What did I learn today? Write down at least one insight.
- Weekly: Block 30 minutes on your calendar to review wins, failures, and areas where adjustments are needed.
- Life Events: After any major success or setback, pause long enough to capture the lesson. Don't just move on?grow on.
Reflection is like interest in a savings account. A little invested consistently compounds into wisdom and better decisions.
Make it Count
Life won't slow down for you. If you don't create space to reflect, you'll keep racing without learning.
That night in Philadelphia reminded me: Today is a gift. Tomorrow isn't promised. Reflection gave me the clarity and power to live more intentionally and to stop waiting for later. It's a reminder that we have the power to shape our lives through reflection and intentional living.
So pause. Ask the questions. Capture the lessons. Don't just experience life?grow from it. Remember, reflection is not a luxury, it's a necessity for personal growth and wisdom.
? Next week, we'll move to Law #5: The Law of Consistency?Motivation Gets You Going, Discipline Keeps You Growing.